skashley217

I met a boy. That's all.

On Saturday night Sarah and I went to hang out at my ex-bf's friends house. he was having a small party. Adam and I talked and what not and I feel like maybe that was the closure I needed. We can maybe be friends.

On a super YAY! note. Sebastian will be here in like 5 days!!!

So it's been a really long time since i updated this thing. As always.

A lot has happened but I'm sure I can't remember it all.

I dropped out of school last semester. I don't know if I mentioned that previously but I did. I am going back in the fall for cosmetology though. We'll see if I can stick with it. I really hope so.

Sonny and I are no longer together. We're sort of friends but he has threatened to kick any guy I dates ass. Seriously. Grow up.

I was seeing a boy who I thought was a nice guy. I ended up sleeping with him. If you know me you know I normally wait like 2 months before I sleep with anyone. Well I didn't wait...it had been almost 2 years and I thought he was nice. Turns out he wasn't. After we slept together a few times he gets drunk and sleeps with the girl across the street. She is a fat cow looking thing. I don't get it. Anyway, she gave him a disease and I get to laugh at him. And he helped me trust guys even less. Thank Jarad Hoss.

I've partied a lot this summer...A LOT. I go out almost every night (until recently cause I'm broke and I met a boy) and drink. Got way wasted at my sisters birthday party. It was awesome. Hangout with Carolyn and Lynn a lot. and a bunches of other peeps. Good times.

I seriously feel like theres a lot more.

Lynn and I went to the aquarium last week. It was fuuuun. I got an alligator thermal mug to take to work with me so I wont use styrofoam cups. They're bad for the environment and I am good for it.

I met a boy and I like him but he doesn't live here...yet. he's moving in a few weeks. *BIG SMILE*

Dang. There is so much more. I suck.

"Capote" is now in my top favorite movies of all time. It was intense. I see why it won so many awards. Amazing. Everyone should see it.

I just want to run away.

Jogging feels good.

I've been putting our treadmill to use as of late. I thought it looked lonely just sitting there and can I just say that I feel accomplished and a lot happier when I step off of it. I've been in a funk lately, I dunno what's wrong with me but I'm always crabby but after I jog on millie (that's treadmill's nickname) I feel really happy. Like maybe I can lose weight be be hot again. I'm not in super good shape but I'm getting better. I walk for like a song and a half or 2 then I jog for a whole song...I'm trying to build up my lung capacity and muscle so I can eventually go two songs then three then four then five then 6 and so on and so forth...I made it through a song and a half today!!! haha "She wants to be alone" by the slackers and half of "the one" by Big D and the Kids Table...I am proud of myslef...you probably think I'm lame. I don't care.

On a kind of sad note...my snake died today (or yesterday I dunno but I found her today,) I'm kind of sad but she's happier now. I didn't have time for her, I didn't take care of her like I should have, and I didn't feed her as often as I should have. I was a bad snake mommy and that is why I'm sad. I want to go to the serpentarium and look at all the snakes and hug them...well you know, not really cause I would probably die but if I could I would. I love snakes and I'm sorry Bindi that I was a bad snake mommy. I am crying now. I suck at life.

R.I.P. Bindi

So this weekend, particularly Saturday, was interesting. I worked friday night and came home and passed out cause we had a front of the house meeting at the burrito barn. Went to that, it was about an hour, hung out with the other burrito girls for a little while after then went to Hardee's with Shelly and Carolyn. Came home did laundry and went to work. After work came home, changed, then Carolyn and I went to my sister's then to Mike and Lauren's apt where my sister and Carolyn proceeded to each take like 8 shots (at least) in the first 45 minutes we were there...idiots. I had a shot of jager and I made myself a little bit of orange juice and mostly vodka drink. So Carolyn was still drinking and Sarah had slowed down a bit. They were both freakin' beyond shitfaced though. About half an hour later some guy runs by and we're like "wtf" then comes back around and he's like "do you know Courtney?" we say no and introduce ourselves. He comes and hangs out with us instead. He was cool. His name was Drew. About half an hour after that Carolyn, Sarah, and Jaimie (one of Sarah's roommates) disappear. The Sarah comes out of the bathroom and says Carolyn and Jaimie are sick. Damn it. Everyone is super drunk and I'm only kind of drunk. Anyway, they are both puking like crazy. Carolyn is in the floor with a trash can and Jaimie is over the toilet. I took a picture but I left the camera at Mike and Lauren's. A little while later I check on them and Carolyn is lying on her back in the floor. I pull her up and prop her against the sink so she won't lay down and Racheal (mike's sister) is yelling to shut the door. I was telling her no I have to keep and eye on Carolyn (She was in baaaaaad shape) and I had my hand on the door frame. Carolyn yells "She's a bitch" and kicks the door shut right on my fingers. Now my fingers are bruised and hurting and she's sry heaving to I'm trying to comfort her and fnid a hair tie and all this while no one else in the apartment really cares. Finally we decided Carolyn needs to go to the hospital cause she isn't really coherenet. She won't drink water, she won't eat bread. She isn't responding to me all she is doing in dry heaving and her eyes are rolling back in her head. We get her to my car and I take Sarah to her apartment. On the way to the hospital Carolyn starts responding more. I decided to just take her home. So I do and he mom answers the door and takes her inside. I feel like her mom probably hates me cause I brought her 18 year old daughter home shit faced but if I hadn't have been there who knows what would have happened. She may have choked on her vomit cause no one would have checked on her and she would have layed back down on her back. That scares me. That girl is like my other little sister. I'm glad I was there. Carolyn has to clean my backseat now though. So I get home around 5am and go to bed. I had to work at 11. It sucked. My fingers are bruised and it was hard carrying plates.

I have today and tomorrow off woot! My fingers can heal. That was my St. Patrick's day. It sucked hole.

I just heard there is going to be a Pilfers reunion show in NYC. I wanna go. I love them. Doubt I'll make it though. I hate NC. I wanna move up there. NY and NJ get all the good shows. BLAH!

It's been a long time since I've posted an entry. A really long time. My bad. Not a whole lot has been going on though. Work's good. I'm seeing someone and he's nice. That's a nice change. School sucks. I've missed a shit ton cause I can't wake up. I don't know why. Like something is wrong. All I do is sleep. I shouldn't be so tired but I am. Sonny (the guy I'm seeing) said that's a sign of depression but I'm really happy. I'm just always tired. So I always sleep. It sucks.

Carolyn and I have been going on bike rides at CB a lot lately. It's so much fun. There are always lots of really cute ducks and seagulls around. And people walking doggies. And stray kitties that will let you pet them. Good times.

I think I hear my mom talking shit about me in the other room. Cunt.

HAPPY BIRTHDAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY TO MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I am so sick and I have to work in a couple of hours. I want to be better. Someone make me betterrrrrrrrr.

I got my monroe pierced yesterday. It's hot. It was my birthday present from sonny! He's great!!!
Speaking of my birthday...it's on ONE WEEK! Get me something nice!

I have an advance copy of the new big d and the kids table album "strictly rude" and it is AMAZING!!! Go get March 30 when it comes out.

It's been a super de duper long time since I wrote a journal cause I'm awesome! Yep.

So what's new? Quite a bit...
School started back. I don't know anyone in any of my classes. And they suck. I'm taking Biology 1 and everyone who has taken bio with the teacher I have said he is SO HARD. shit. And I have American History and the teacher is AWESOME. I think this class is gonna be gravy (hahahah). We'll see. The teacher is very laid back surferish. It's cool. I'm also taking Intermediate Algebra (don't laugh. I know I'm dumb) and the teacher is nuts. He doesn't make a lot of sense. So I'm gonna have to learn the material on my own I think. grr. And last but not least Tennis. I'm sort of nervous about this cause I'm not very good and I have NO IDEA what level everyone else is on. I'll see next Friday.

Uhm...I got a job!!! I start at Flaming Amy's Burrito Barn next Wednesday! I'm excited. Carolyn works there so I know someone. And I sort of know Jen that works there as well. I hope everyone is cool. Word is they aren't. hmm...

What else...I dunno. I can't think of much. I'm pretty boring I guess.

Merry Christmas.

I am in love tomatoes...yuuuuuum.

I feel a lot better today. Still blah but I think it's cause I am a girl and stuff. yeah. I still love my whore of a sister.

I am in the worst mood ever. I was fine until a little while ago and then all of a sudden the simplest thing (if done by the right person) can make you feel like a loser.

I just feel like since Chris and I broke up (almost 2 years ago) that I have no friends and no one wants to be my friend. When we broke up I lost all of my friends (literally) because they all skated with him and he was always hanging out with them and I didn't want to be around him. I'm so over him it's not funny. That's not the point of all this.

I just feel like he ruined me. I am like terrified of social situations because of him. Cause from ages 17-21 all I did was hang out with him and we never went anywhere. Just hung out with the usual people at the usual house. So I'm like socially retarded. I get overly anxious if someone wants me to meet them somewhere and I know there are going to be a lot of people there that I don't know.

Anyway, lately I've been feeling a lot better about situation such as that cause I have forced myself into them instead of making up lame excuses in order to not face them. So as soon as I feel better about hanging out and being around people, no one wants me around. It's like cause I was so afraid for so long that people are just like 'yeah ashley's lame she doesn't hang out' so they don't call me.

Sarah is my only like real friend, Carolyn too but she's never around. And Sarah has all these other friends, who I would like to be friends with as well, but she never invites me along and I'm not gonna be rude and just come. So she's at a party tonight (which by the way she said I was invited to then just left.) and I am here all alone writing this dumb blog. Being emo. My moral is too low right now to do anything. And I have a 10 page paper due on Tuesday. I've written 3 sentences and I just can't get myself to do it cause I feel bad. I just want to talk to someone but she isn't here and I really have no one else.

Moral of this emo blog. Don't let an ex ruin you and steal your friends.

I can't wait to move to Florida and make all new friends and just forget about everyone here.

Only one more class left in all my hard classes...and it's only finals. 5 more for math but I'm not stressed about it cause I'm basically rocking it like a hurricane.

I should be writing a 10 page paper thats due on tuesday but you know me. I've hardly started. BLAH.

Last night Sarah and I dressed up like $0.25 hookers. We even took the time to crimp our hair. Helps with the effect. We took pictures. I think we look like Dee Snider. We're gonna start a band called Twisted Sister(s). yup.

I need coffee. I'm like addicted to the stuff now. AHH.

Oh, add to my christmas list: Leaopard print ear muffs and a checkered scarf!

Wow I haven't posted in quite sometime. A lot has been going on.

School is out in a week! YES!!! I am seriously not going to know what to do with myself. No papers to write. No homework. Next semester should be a lot better. I can't wait to be out of english forever...or at least a long time.

I'm trying to make a powerpoint for a group project tomorrow for lit. class and everyone has emailed me their part except one guy and his part is pretty important. BLAH on him. I hope he doesn't get a grade on this. grr.

So let's see. On the 30th we (me, sarah, carolyn, and james) went to myrtle beach and saw reel big fish, streetlight manifesto, suburban legends, and westbound train. It was so much fun. It wasn't as fun as the previous times I've seen these bands because apparently hardcore kids think it's cool to do thier retarded ninja kicks and push people around at a ska show. GET A FUCKING CLUE. but Sarah, Carolyn, and I found a spot to dance where we wouldn't get ninja kicked to death (but if we would have dropped our change someone would have snatched it right up for us! That's a plus...maybe haha) We also ran into a few of the South Carolina ska guys. Joel (who does mispelied productions) and a couple other guys that I have talked to before online. It was awesome. We all hung out pretty much all night. It was a fun time. They are REALLY cool guys. I'm sure I'll see them again. Maybe we can all have a ska weekend SKAravan next summer for ska weekend! That would be AWESOME! Anywho...James got the beat girl tattooed on his arm when we got back to town and then he went back to chapel hill saturday night. He's coolio yo.

Uhm...other than that not much has happened. School is seriously raping me right now but it's almost over. I had a freaking anxiety attack earlier this afternoon cause of it. I had to go take a hot bath to calm me down. I've been getting those a lot lately. I don't know where they come from.

I'm gonna be working at the Carolina Beach cinema with my sister for the holidays. She's gonna be my boss! RAD!

Shredder at the zipper on my bookbag yesterday. I'm pissed about that. Fucking parrot.

That's all for now.

Fin.

I'm real bored.

Step 1: Put your iTunes/MP3/Launchast player on random.
Step 2: Post the first line(s) of the first 20 songs that play, no matter how embarrassing the song.
Step 3: Post and let everyone you know guess what song and artist the lines come from.
Step 4: Strike out the songs when someone guesses correctly.
Step 5: NO CHEATING


1. "sister sister sister"

2. "There was a kid so low, he couldn't stand up"

3. "Where do you come from? You come from anywhere"

4. "I just made an enemy of someone I don't know and they are upset about something that I must have done."

5. "Tommy stepped away from the world for a while"

6. "Night falls and I'm taken by sleep."

7. "Beauty queen of only 18 she had some trouble with herself."

8. "I want your misery I want you to be what I hate in me"

9. "Things have changed, I'm not the same."

10. "Caution is a word that I can't understand"

11. "he wakes up sad again and he wonders when the rain will end."

12. "home is this a quiet place where you should be alone?"

13. "in walked capo (capo capo)" hahah (DUH!)

14. "I thought it was infatuation I couldn't burn the bridges behind me."

15. "well approximation of the situation tends to bend when you have too much to drink and you piss off your friends"

16. "I won't say it like I mean it, we let this go on to long"

17. "I looked around when you said it was coming down"

18. "The sounds in High Fidelity are my personal luxury"

19. "sappy pathetic little me, that was the girl I used to be"

20. "it's a good year for a murder she's praying to Jesus she pulling the trigger."





That was a huge waste of time. I bet lots of you know those songs, though.